Cheating Denver Broncos Flood Stadium With Marijuana Smoke, Cause Dizzied Chiefs To Lose Sunday Night Game

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UPDATE: Tom Brady Avenges Kansas City Chiefs, Overcomes Marijuana Infused Denver Bronco’s Defense With Last Second Heroics 31 – 34.

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Multiple NFL teams have complained the high marijuana to oxygen ration inside Mile High Stadium gives the marijuana-trained Broncos an unfair advantage at home against incoming teams from states where marijuana remains appropriately illegal.

Denver, Colorado – Shocking new reports from sources in Denver confirm that Denver Broncos personnel were seen flooding Mile High Stadium with marijuana smoke, inundating the stadium with copious clouds of the mind-altering chemical moments before the game.  Sources claim Denver Broncos staff also flooded the Chief’s lockeroom with a constant stream of marijuana smoke before the game and during halftime, as they have done with other teams for the last two years.

NBC commentators noted that several Chiefs players, including veteran quarterback Alex Smith, complained of instantly feeling ‘dizzy and nauseated’ when they took to the stadium to do stretches and practice before the game started. Chief’s coach Andy Reid complained of feeling like he was ‘having a stroke’ as he stood on the sideline, trying to focus on his players and finding out why his receivers continually dropped passes throughout the first half of the Sunday night game.

“It is suspicious when you have Charles dropping five your toss-ups and Peyton Manning chucking 60-yard touchdown passes off his left foot to his receivers, our guys hardly able to keep their balance and giggling,” a stoic Andy Reid said, saying the Chiefs will get beyond this game and prepare for San Diego next week.

Chiefs fans watching the game on Jumbo-tron back at Arrowhead Stadium were equally skeptical.  “You have to wonder if the Broncos are trying to give out contact high to incoming teams.  They train in marijuana-laden conditions, other teams cannot compete with that. There is a conspiracy going on here and it involves the government of Colorado itself,” Chiefs fan Nadia Botwin stated.

Buffalo Bills v Denver BroncosBotwin may have a reasonable concern.  The Chief’s receivers did drop the ball more than usual and even more questionable, the Chief’s usually devastating pass rush was nothing but wobbly legs and failed tackling attempts against an aging quarterback.

The image at right blatantly shows a marijuana-conditioned Broncos player walking through a field of marijuana smoke earlier this season.

If the evidence and accusations are correct, the Broncos are actively training in marijuana heavy conditions and then flooding the locker rooms of visiting teams with marijuana, and the stadium with marijuana, making the other team devastatingly ‘high’ and unfocused throughout the game.

And this is the secret to how the Broncos are pulling off victories like they did tonight.  I will draft an official letter to the NFL to investigate the Bronco’s underhanded strategies, which again, has been an ongoing complaint by multiple teams playing against this morally questionable franchise.

New Evidence A

In this video image, look at how the Chief’s coach cannot resist playing tickle fingers with Fisher here.  This is not natural and the exact type of behavior you would expect to see of someone who was just forced to inhale Colorado’s classic, cruddy skunk weed for the first time.

 New Evidence B

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Broncos fill the air with wafts of Colorado Skunk, churning the stomachs and minds of the pure-air-trained Kansas City Chiefs.

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Description unavailable (Photo credit: BabyBare11)

 

New Evidence C

Dwayne Bowe was caught this week training for the game, by trying to smoke a little last second bowl as he sped toward the team practice. Officers dropped charges for now after the Chief’s staff explained how the players have to ‘try to train’ against the Bronco’s cheating techniques.

New Evidence D

ManningYou have to wonder how much of Satan’s laughing gas Peyton Manning smoked to play on that broken ankle, pain free.  You don’t just ‘snap’ your ankle the week before, get a questionable MRI, then go out to chuck 60-yard touchdown passes on the run on your ‘bum’ right ankle without hopping up on some sort of drugs.  Considering Manning was not falling asleep as he studied the Chief’s playbook on the sideline, we can only guess he was high on marijuana.

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31 Comments

  • Please tell me you’re joking… I didn’t realize you could literally take a fresh piece of cow shit, insert it into your computer, and post it on the internet. The fact that the author is “Leading the charge of faith at Bible Fellowship Church” scares me more than you can possibly imagine.

  • Sore losers. Let’s get real here. Kansas Shitty couldn’t pull it off.

  • Singingtothewheat

    OMG!
    I was having a tough time feeling sorry for the Chiefs. They fought a great game against MY BRONCO’S (YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA)
    This reporter is the one that is obviously getting High

  • I honestly cant believe that this person was allowed to publish a story so absurd.. this man actually claims that staff members pumped mind altering chemicals into the locker room of the opposing team.. not focusing on the fact that marijuana is not some mind altering nerve agent that would prevent grown men from playing a football game, i find it a touch absurd that any of what this man said could actually be taken seriously by those that read it. I think some one would notice a cloud of skunky smoke being pumped into the locker room and taking into account the amount of smoke it would take to get an entire team of football players contact high to the point of impeding athletic performance, Assuming that is even possible, makes this more than a ridiculous claim.. I would be very offended if i were a member of the broncos team or staff.. Talk about a sore loser.. The chiefs lost and the only explanation that makes sense to this reporter is that they secretly got the entire team high on weed by secretly pumping smoke into the chiefs locker room? Couldn’t be that the chiefs were just bested on this particular Sunday? Also as with most American stadiums smoking is strictly prohibited and so even if every adult in the crowd fired up a joint at the same time it is physically impossible to concentrate the smoke to a point where any one on the field could be affected.. they are outside in a gigantic stadium and sitting at a higher elevation than the field.. I hope every one who reads this comes to a similar conclusion.. I feel sorry for Haywood Bynum III.. That in his mind this actually took place and makes total sense.. Merica’ Fuk yea

  • Bullshit…. Go smoke a joint and relax… And you got your job how?

  • Sore losers! Dont know how to take a loss! Get over it cuz another ones coming!!!! :) GO DENVER!! :)

  • That’s a load of crap! Peyton won this game and others legally!!!

  • it’s funny how colorado people act now with the passing of one law. We get it, you’re the new texas, you’re the shit!

    lmfao.

  • Andrew Sampson

    This is so fucking stupid! This is one of the most ridiculous things iver ever heard. We “at mile high” apparently filtered smoke to the locker room of the Chiefs!!! woooow, this guy who wrote this and The KC chiefs are some sore ass losers. The only reason they were 9-0 is because they were playing somewhat easy teams and they never had had to be in a clutch poistion like the one against the broncos and dominate like the “good team they are”
    Why does the guy who write this make weed sounds like you’ll literally loose your mind and start laughing uncontrollably and tickle your players. you have never smoked it before, writer. I hope they look into this, because theyll find out there no weed smoke being filtered in, and you Mr. Haywood Bynum III will be exposed as a lyin sack of shit who is trying to start a constraversy just because Colorado is Colorado. GOOD DAY!!!!

  • The best satirical pieces are those written so well, the reader has a hard time telling if the author is serious or not. This is either one of those well-written articles by a pretty funny writer, or a lunatic fringe rant by someone who should join Westboro Baptist.

  • sherron O'Hare

    Unbelievable. KANSAS. such POOR LOOSERS

  • Hahaha wow it is funny, especially when we have played better at OTHER stadiums

  • BroncoFan4Life

    This is the most asinine article I have ever read…Even if it is fake…Makes the losing team’s fans look like sore losers…

  • SORRY I SEEM TO BE TOO HIGH TO COMPREHEND WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO COME ACROSS WITH THIS ARTICLE. IT IS SO THAT EVER COLORADIAN IS HIGH 24/7 GIVEN THAT AMENDMENT 64 HAS BEEN PASSED, YES THAT SEEMS EXTREMELY LOGICAL.

  • I call bullshit ! All described symptoms are from altitude sickness.

  • Ha well I think it’s safe to say they don’t know how to play at this altitude…..hence why they might have felt dizzy and nauseous….it’s called altitude sickness duh! Wow Kansas way to make yourself look even worse than your team did against the All Mighty Broncos…..in fact we are on a whole new level, I heard a song called “All Hustle No Luck” by Lantana the other day and this song would be perfect for the Denver Broncos, because the bottom line is the Broncos are all hustle and no luck every game! Super Bowl Bound! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSIuz1CQ5vk

  • SERIOUSLY?? U PPL ARE PATHETIC AN SORE LOSERS!!! LET ME GUESS DENVER IS THE ONLY TEAM IN THE NFL TO NOT GET DRUG TESTED AN BE ALLOWED TO USE MARIJUANA? YEAH NICE TRY

  • The ntwo best teams in the NFL are Seattle and Denver. Guess which two states allow legal marijuana? Is it mere coincidence?

  • This article is hysterical I loved it. Obviously written by a comedic writer and not to be taken seriously. Come on Broncos fans, you have more class and brains than this writer and cannot possibly take any of this seriously. Laughed so hard while I read it I almost peed my pants.

  • You have got to be kidding me! A player blatantly running through a field of marijuana smoke? This is so far out of left field..only cheap, poor losers. Led by their coach. This is so ridiculous.

    • RockChalkChiefs

      For everyone that thought this was real, please remove yourself from planet Earth. We’ve got evolving to do.

  • Evidence A is utterly stupid. As you can tell the “coach” is wearing a peacoat and has a trainer to the left of him. Looks to me like that’s a doctor doing a numbness test. B. How do we know that’s pot smoke.anyone been there to smell it.

  • I knew that modern day media was crap, but this hits an all time low. Completely ridiculous!

  • Wonder what excuse they have now for Chief’s loss at home?? LOL!!!

  • that is complete bull… just because it is legal in Colorado all of a sudden its as if more than half of the players never smoked Pot which lets face it more than half of them used to at some point in their lives smoked Pot, lets get real here… Quit slandering other states and their teams just because Pot is legal here in Colorado. Big whoop, maybe on the next ballot you will choose to become a Pot smoking state as well. Just for clarification, I smoke Pot everyday. It helps me keep control of0 my mental disabilities. Look at science before you trash something.

    • As someone who lived in Colorado for 20+ years, I must ask the people of the internet to not judge us all by this idiot.
      Nina, I don’t know if you’re smoking too much, too little, or the wrong strain… but I recommend that you stay away from The Onion or Christwire.

      .
      ..

      Nope, it’s still a colossal waste of time and (public) money.

  • Omg! Quit crying! That coach is just a perv, the smoke is seriously smoke, and Manning is just a beast.

  • This might actually be enough reason for me to find football interesting.
    .
    ..

    Nope, it’s still a colossal waste of time and (public) money.

  • Hmm weed smoking helps cure nausea, not make one nauseous.
    that has been proven by studies with cancer.
    Can they not tell it is marijuana by the way it smells? It has a very distinct odor! Seriously how would they not know!
    Maybe the players who say they were getting sick should be tested to see if there is any THC in their system. Sounds like a bunch of bull.
    Sounds more like the players cant handle the altitude, dizziness is due the thinner oxygen. Dizziness will bring an onset of nausea.

  • “Leading the charge of faith at Bible Fellowship Church” explains it all. I will admit. The article was lolz. But totally untrue.

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