Greedy Modern Americans Celebrate Thanksgiving with Black Friday Tipi Tent Communities

Sterling Manchester II
• TopekasNews

Americans are reinventing the spirit of Thanksgiving in a way only the world’s leading capitalist nation can do. Outside stores nationwide, instead of waiting for family to come to down or defrosting the Thanksgiving turkey, Americans are building modern day tipi communities outside their favorite retail stores.

In this image, a tribe of Americans have built modern tipis and await the crucial hunt.  Rarely used muscles tense and girthy bellies primed with snack cakes, this mighty tribe of Americans will viciously emerge from their tents two days later to hunt down great deals on electronics. 

This modern phenomena shows a regression of sorts, as many places temperatures dip well into the 40s or even 30s, blistering cold temperatures for Americans who typically opt to keep their homes around a comfortable 75 degrees.

Modern Americans, much like Native Americans, do not waste their kill.  Whereas Native Americans made sure to use the fur, bones, meat and innards of animals they would kill for survival, modern Americans adapt such resourcefulness.  The box that holds their new big screen television or computer may be gifted to friends or saved in a closet, so that it can be given to a friend who is moving or even better, serve as a container for the old television set that’s being thrown away.

The inner bubble wrapping will be popped for hours and used as a toy by children and the shifty-eyed parent who cannot resist, while instructions for assembly will be thrown into the fireplace as extra kindling.

Nothing will stop modern Americans from camping out and hunting for deals:  a nice family holiday, cold temperatures, realizing the fact that they really don’t have an extra $1,000 to drop on electronics, despite the savings of $49.98.  But the spirit of freedom and the hunt lives strong in the genes of Americans, even though for the other 364 days a year going outside and enjoying ‘nature’ is a rarity.

 

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