Anonymous Declares War On North Korea, Shuts Down Its Websites and Net
Pyongyang, North Korea – The whole state of North Korea is in utter shock today after coming under attack by Anonymous, the web activist group. Anonymous announced an official state of war with North Korea after their ‘great leader’ Kim Jong Un threatened to drop nuclear bombs upon South Korea and its ally, The United States of America.
“The moment of explosion is approaching fast, war could break out today or tomorrow,” North Korea’s Supreme Military Command issued in a statement.
The United States has dispatched several elements of its Pacific fleet, reinforcing aerial missile defense and naval presence across the Western seaboard. Without a doubt, America has turned its massive stockpile of nuclear arms in direct aim at North Korea and any nation who will ally with it.
As all this takes place, the Western nations may find Anonymous’ timing to be grand. Without sufficient internet communication, North Korea’s efforts to electronically control any missile control system can be hampered. The communist-state will also need to worry about external attempts at hacking their internal software, which could grant control of their nuclear arms and other sensitive equipment.
North Korean commercial and state websites are still largely unreachable at time of report. The
North Korean women openly sob and run through the streets, in sheer panic because their favorite e-commerce sites have been crippled by Anonymous. Insiders report that web traffic in North Korea has been brought to a halt after the recent attacks and that the North Korean societal elite are sorely afraid of America’s ability to ‘invade the great internet of North Korea.’
Kim Jong Un has also expressed anger with the timing of the attacks, as he will not have access to the NCAA tournament app that he was using to stream the collegiate gameplay on his Droid. Kim Jong Un has been a and purportedly created a bracket for this year’s tournament, where he chose the Louisville Cardinals to win the national title.
According to ESPN, the basketball fan looked forward to seeing all the games possible. Now that he cannot, Kim Jong Un wants to drop nuclear bombs upon the United States even more.
Now that North Korea has demonstrated nuclear capability and delivery systems, the United States is taking every threat seriously. Defense Representative Hagel comments at the National Defense University: “We take those threats seriously, we have to take those threats seriously.”
At time of report, the The Manilla Bulletin reports that North Korea is working tirelessly to restore its most popular social networking, shopping site and air travel site: http://www.friend.com.kp/, http://www.naenara.com.kp/ and http://www.airkoryo.com.kp/.
They did it with an old 486 box and a 33.6k faxmodem, too.
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OMG, but what if North Korea nukes Moot’s house?
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We heard it was actually a Haye’s 256 baud Micromodem, Jason Bronner.
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Haha. North korea already has no outside access for its citizens. Its pointless.
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Very possibly.
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i love this site
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And to think I thought Anonymous were all godless bigots!
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