Hand of God Spotted By NASA Telescope, Throwing Meteor At Sinful Earth

Religion and Astronomy are one in the same, for the first words of the Bible are as follows:  “In the beginning, GOD created the heavens and the Earth.”

In this new photograph by NASA, scientists finally confess that they have found proof of God.  Officials with NASA have named this photo ‘the hand of God’ and we can see, it is very angry.  God is letting us catch a glimpse of his hand grabbing a meteor, and I can only guess he has a fiery surprise waiting to thaw us out of this polar vortex.

We can see God is in mid-throw here, casually grabbing a blazing hot meteor or small star, chucking it trillions of miles across space and toward Earth.  My guess is that it’s going to land smackdab in the middle of a marijuana field in Colorado, or perhaps China if they don’t ease up on trying to buy up American interests for their own profit.

God’s hand is moving so fast here, NASA had to use its special Nuclear Spectroscopic Telescope Array to catch this spectacular image.  His hand moves far too fast for the normal human eye to see.

NASA ranks the energy given off just from this throw as ‘high energy’, enough energy to create the universe.   Just think with a simple flick of the wrist, God has generated enough energy to power the entire universe.

This image has been labeled PSR B1509-58 by NASA.  According to the initial report, the wrist ‘spins around 7 times per second, blowing wind particles that sent several nearby starts into their death throes and supernovas, before chucking the giant, fiery object in a trajectory toward Earth.’

I have faith that if we pray and recriminalize marijuana possession in Colorado, making the sentence for being found with a milligram the same as being found with a pound of crack rock, God will call this fastball off and we won’t suffer getting hit by such a meteorite.

If someone tries to tell you this is a pareidolia, make sure to remind them that people far smarter than them at NASA named this object ‘The Hand of God’.