Giant Sun Eruption Captured by NASA, Are The Gays to Blame?

Sterling Manchester II
• TopekasNews
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The solar flare unleashed by the Sun, is it a pure act of random science or are gay people to blame?

(CW GLOBAL) – In a rare moment of scientific marvel, NASA scientists have captured recent eruptions on the surface of the Sun. These recordings are in high definition and many people have been put into a state of wonder and awe due to the sheer magnitude of the massive coronal mass ejection.

Could a universe randomly strung together produce a display so magnificent and powerful?

Parishioners at Topeka Baptist Bible Fellowship Church definitely seem to think so. In fact, they think that the magnitude of the Sun’s explosion is directly proportional to the ‘steaming anger of God’s holy wrath due to gay marriage laws supported by Obama’.

After a televised Sunday sermon, the mid-sized congregation’s chief parishioner, Bishop Haywood Bynum III, drew ire from the local community and national media after claiming that the sun’s massive explosion was actually a ‘coronal mass erection’ and allowed by God to ‘certify Satan’s lust for the Earth and mankind will be allowed, since mankind does not care enough to keep God’s dictations pure and true.”

The church’s sermon is being denounced as ‘outlandish’ by many but sadly, mirrors beliefs held by nearly 20% of the region’s faithful.

Media: Listen to sermon blaming solar eruption on gay people


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