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Local Kansas Man Shoots Down Amazon Delivery Drone, Claims It ‘Invaded My Property’


The apparent remains of an Amazon Prime Sky Delivery Drone unit smolder on the property of Kansas native Dudson Williams, who believes he has the right to shoot down any drone under local ‘stand your ground’ law.

[adsense]Tecumseh, Kansas – Local man Dudson Williams did not hesitate to pull out his shotgun and call his sons in from the cow pasture.  “We are not having any this Skynet bullsh** in my town,” Williams loudly exclaimed in our interview.

Williams reports he was making a fresh pitcher of iced tea in his kitchen, when he heard a strange hovering sound over his quaint ranch-style home.  “I knew my old lady had just ordered some Christmas gifts off the Amazon for our new daughter-in-law and I heard that 60-minutes report.  I put two and two together, immediately pulled out my shotgun and called my boys in for back up.”

After firing off several rounds, Williams expresses he was immediately concerned for not only the safety of his family, but also the safety of America.

“I had a good beat on the damned thing and it was deft, it was lithe!  It dodged my shots.  Amazon may have had the Red Baron piloting that thing, because it pulled a barrel roll and even taunted a kamikaze nose dive at me in its efforts to deliver a package to my front porch.”

Dudson continued, “If an Amazon drone can do all this, just imagine what a military-grade Obama drone can do!”

Like the cavalry in an old Western, Dudson claims as he was trying to swat the drone away as it continually divebombed him ‘like an angry mother crow protecting her nest’ that his sons came over the big hill by the pasture, just in time.

Drone nosedived toward Williams’ home before breaking a window with its robotic arm, gently tossing the delivery package of gifts again before taking off to explode a safe distance away from the Williams family. The drone sustained heavy damage from gunfire.

“The thing [Amazon drone] kept divebombing me, it was annoying and frightening.  I dropped my gun and kept swatting it away with my hands, trying to ward it off.”

Dudson then heard a precision shot fired off in the distance, it was his son with a CenterFired Rifle Scope.  “My son got in a good hit on it, and it called off its attack on me and took to a higher altitude,” Dudson reported.

With his sons on scene, the three were able to combined their gunfire and eventually subdue the Amazon Drone.  This was not before it made its delivery, however, according to Williams.  “We had a few good hits on the thing and like a wounded hero in a movie, it kept trying to make its delivery.”

“In one last amazing sequence, I almost cried at what it was doing.  It took a final nose dive at the house, kicked through the glass window with one of its robotic legs and gently tossed the package inside the break in the window.  It then cried out ‘error, error’ and then crashed, a safe distance away from us.”


After circling the home several times, the Amazon drone busted a window and delivered the gift package, before succumbing to damage.

Williams’ sons also claim they felt a weird emotion, a sort of sympathy for this robotic drone ‘just trying to do its job’.  Lance Williams, Dudson’s 23-year-old son explained, “We were nailing it and it was taking damage, smoking and spiraling out of control.  I was shocked when I realized it was breaking a window to our house so it could make its delivery.  I was touched when I heard it exclaim ‘Error!’ and speed off to a safe distance from us, before exploding and crashing in our yard.”

Lance continued, “I can only hope Amazon does not sell this drone technology to America’s enemies.”